July 14, 2009
Dear Little Boy,
I have heard you’re doing well in school. You have to because I would blame myself for not helping you up in school stuff.
I know you have more friends now. At least you will feel less lonely without me around.
I am happy you have your grandparents right now; they can protect you as much as I want too.
Always be in a good shape little boy so that I will worry less everyday of my life.
Please don’t blame me when some moments of your life you needed me and I wasn’t there. If I could just travel in a matter of seconds to be there with you, I’d love too.
Every time someone asks you where I am. Thank you for your smart replies that I am here in a foreign land working BECAUSE OF YOU, I feel that I am not useless anymore the way I used to be.
I am learning that the purpose of my sacrifice is more for you and less for me, and that makes me a better person.
I’m sorry that I have to leave you and will leave you again. Please bear the space between us, embrace your loneliness with understanding, and forgive me by your love.
I am missing you so much my little boy, I will be back soon and we will make up the times. I am always thinking everyday about you and I can’t wait to see and feel you again.
I love you as always,
Your grown Mom.
April 17, 2009
Parting time
Leaving your comfort zone and moving to a new place might be one of your major decisons in life. Just the thought of leaving people you used to be with and not sure about what will happen the next day, you need more air for breathing.
Maybe that’s what our friend thought & feel when she decided to leave Dubai & go back to her comfort zone in Pinas. Maybe she thinks that life is such difficult to deal with as much as i believe too. Eventhough how hard you try to convince yourself that this is our life works, but then you ended up losing your mind & your feeling wins.
As our friend said goodbye i can’t keep thinking that i don’t like the feeling of being unsure. Unsure that everything is permanent. I thought i could swallow the pain of parting time for i am aware of that scenes in my life, but the more you will experience it the more you will realize that people come & go and this is a fact.
The scenario reminded me of my last day in Pinas. It was not remarkable experience. and I am sad of course that our friend left for good. Who will be the next one to left? that i do not know. But i am certain that i will get sad again and again as long as there is still moments of parting time.
Have a wonderful life ahead my friend. Still we are your second family here in Dubai, UAE. As as our parting words says, thank you for the friendship….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Czp5MQoBp80
February 11, 2009
BYEBYE
One of my roommates is leaving this coming 15th of the month and I am so glad. Call me insensible but I am really glad, actually we are pleased of her decision.
Starting that date no one will bother us in the middle of the night. We cannot hear her voice saying like hell “hi baby, how are you, I miss you…baby…baby” Because she’s actually talking to her boyfriend thru webcam in the midst of our deep sleep and it is really annoying! From now on we can turn off our light early and we can talk without her interrupting us.
It’s not that we don’t like her, we just don’t like the way she acted. If you are in the right sense how could you afford to disturb the people around you as if you don’t know that they were sleeping and trying to have a good sleep for the next day to catch up things at work. If you have the rational thinking you should go out from the bed room, stay in the living room and continue your cyber love affair, and one will curse you anymore.
When we learned that she’s living. No one bothered to stop her.
We just hope that whoever will occupy her place has lot of sensitivity and patience (because in the morning we are noisy, she/he might get irritated as well) J
February 1, 2009
MISS KO NA KAYO!
I have an unforgettable friendship with these people. Working with them before had gave me so much fun. Kung baga kahit pagod ka na at di mo na na eenjoy ang trabaho knowing na andyan lang sila, shared with same feelings eh you will feel better.
One thing that i missed with them was the times of lunch break that we shared food together, teasing each other, pinag uusapan ung buhay ng ibang tao, sharing green jokes at ung discussion about how not to get pregnant even ur sexually active, hahaha, si kuya dhan ung professor namin at gumamit pa talaga ng black board to explain everything, until now wala pa namang nabubuntis. (lol).
We talked everything kahit ung mga lovelife na walang ka kwenta kwenta pinag uusapan din. We shared during merienda time ~~ung pansit, softdrinks at walang kasawa sawang pandesal, and of course pinag uusapan din namin ung about sa work, sino ung mga buwisit for the day.
after that, back to work, back to YM and friendster din. hahaha. There were so many gimick after 5pm. How many bottles of beer and pulutan na ba ang naubos, how many songs were played sa videok, kahit si jjay batang bata walang patawad kasama parin ng grupo. Ilang manok naba ang naubos sa penongs? ang tindi, ang tindi ng pagka miss ko sa mga tao nato.
But reality check not all the time we will be together. May umaalis, may naiiwan. Sa grupo, kuya dhan left us first for good. He went to Houston to be with his wife, ung luha ko at that time talagang diko napigilan, si kuya dhan kasi ung tipo na talagang pang brotherhood ang drama, lahat ng sekreto ko ata sa buhay alam na niya, problema sa computer ko or sa personal he helped me in some ways.
The next person left was ME, at syempre masakit din ung ikaw ang mang iwan. May drama din ung last day ko, before saying goodbyes~~isang basong luha ata ang pwede ko nang inumin. hehehe.
After me, April left, she was hired to other company na mas stable ang dating. I was in dubai na at that time & i have no idea kung ano ang whole story of her despedida party, but i was sure it was sad pero at least si april nasa davao lang, anytime they could meet and do the same gimicks.unlike me & kuya dhan kailangan pa ng air tickets.
Jen left too after a couple of months cguro. I know she was happy kasi talagang buwisit na buwisit na ata sya sa company. Lol. Nag goodbye party ba siya? I wasn’t able to ask.
Si yen mag re resign na ata but i don’t know when. Others i have no idea but i can see some of their pics they loooked good parin naman.
That’s life works. We can’t keep our closest friends near all the time, the fact that we have different lives to be settle. The least things we could do is to enjoy every moment with our friends. Keep the memories alive and same with the shared friendship. Importante din ung madami kayong mga pictures, these will serve the living proof that sometimes in your life your were together and happy.
Today is my off from work and as i checked my u tube video and see this one, i can’t stop my self para mag drama ~ a slight tears lang naman, sobra miss ko na sila!~ miss ko na kayo mga friends…everything we had shared sa kingcoop hindi ko pa na experience while working here. Iba din ung almost 2 years na pinagsamahan natin.
At kung saan man ako makakarating, friends ko parin kayo kahit di nyo man lang ako ma txt at naghihintay lang kayo na ako mauna, ako parin ba mag pa plano ng lahat? hahaha.
January 13, 2009
MY BIRTHDAY BLUES
My birthday is coming and I am feeling blues for nights in so many reasons.
I don’t have my family to celebrate with.
My old friends are in the Philippines.
My kibz enjoying our silence.
My birthday falls on working day.
We don’t have birthday leave.
I’m getting older without achievements.
I’m getting bored in my work.
I’m always arguing with my bitch boss.
I am missing everyone.
Last night I listened to my mp3 songs. One of the songs that I really don’t pay much attention seizes my moment ~~ the song of Mr. Gary Valenciano of Natutulog ba ang Diyos~~. As the song played, it doesn’t consider me anymore of the teleserye of Roxanne Ginoo before, but it reminds me that God is just there to help me out and waiting for me. I have been ignoring Him and asking Him a lot of things that I don’t understand. I haven’t met the expectations of His answers, and that makes me think that I do not exist to Him anymore.
I could wear my mask everyday to show on that everything is alright but I couldn’t hide what is inside. Inside that are longing and missing. Inside that wants to be understood. Inside that wants to be happy. And the composer of the song is right, my life is important to Him.
My birthday is coming and I am not feeling blues.
My family will call me & send me greetings of love.
I received advance greetings from my old friends and I know some will greet me on the day.
I’m planning to off from work on my birthday, have some rest & go to church.
Though I’m getting older but I looked like very young. (Lol)
I have many achievements ~~ my family is complete and I have my little boyfriend James.
I have still my work.
I believe that my bitch boss will get what she deserves ~ deport to her hometown sooner or later~ (Lol)
Though my kibz is enjoying his silence, I wouldn’t interfere.
Though I am missing everyone, at least half of them are still communicating with me.
God given me another year to live, to learn & enjoy.
Take note:
I am not celebrating alone in my birthday, I have here my second family ~my new friends (mga bayot) ~. Though they keep asking me from the first day of this week what to do in my day, I appreciate their loving offers to cook for me. I think it is not much to prepare sisig & pancit, cake & ice cream for dessert and some beer if someone will do the treat.
Happy Birthday to me. This is my first birthday in Dubai, UAE. J
October 16, 2008
Numb
I believe that life has its own way of revealing things that you haven’t been expecting. Sometimes you have to go out from your shell, be uncomfortable, be real and be hurt.
Most of the time you forgot the reason of your existence. You don’t know what you really want and you forgot what makes you happy. Sometimes it is only good to be numb.
April 20, 2008
10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT MYSELF
1. STUBBORN ~ i am irrationally determined to get something that i want. Try to ask my parents, they will give you the best answer.
3. PESSIMISTIC ~ At times of unrecovering a problems. (defensive)
4. FATALISTIC ~ I always believe that people are powerless to change their fate. Tendency to accept what’s in front of me and avoid changes. (this is dangerous, right?)
5. MISERLY ~ (wikipedia: a MISER person is reluctant to spend money, sometimes to the point of forgoing even basic comforts)Honestly, sometimes, I am. hehehe.
6. POSSESSIVE ~ Controlling or dominating others
(am i?) huhuhu. Sounds familiar.
7. IMPATIENT ~ This is me. I HATE being kept waiting. If i want to do something, i want to do it immediately.
8. LAZY/COUCH POTATO ~ Do i have to explain? (hehehe)
basically, when im just at home. My home is my sanctuary (i hope this explains :))
9. STRAIGHTFORWARD ~I may hurt other people’s feeling.
When i ask questions bluntly,they could no longer answer it.(but i still have lots of friends)
10. FICKLE ~ I am a changeable person, in thoughts..in feelings…(this caused me a lot of troubles especially in decision making process)
This is me. Take it or Leave it. It’s not my problem anymore. 
April 16, 2008
WHEN IT FALLS APART
Good things never last. When it falls apart you might be seeing diverse reasons, but actually it is just the upshot of pain. Pain of thoughts that the person is no longer yours. Pain of hope that you could somehow back the times.
When it falls apart~~there is a sudden change of your life. And you couldn’t do anything but just to let it go.
When it falls apart… it is a pain.
February 3, 2008
LOVE PHOTOS
You might be wondering why i have these kinds of photos here. It’s not about like wanting "doing it" but it’s about thinking "how nice to do it" with your love one.
Anyway this may result to my weariness. I have been travelling for more than two weeks and just lately realized that Valentines Day is coming. I will be seeing hearts, reading love notes and hearing cupid’s songs and i am deeply sure i would be very sentimental about it. I think it is understood that I am far from him.
But life must go on as always it is to be. And when i saw these pictures, no second thought of posting it to my blog.
I hope you find it pleasures and to feel the warm of sensing it with your love ones.
<——A very sexy shot! Now my day is messed up! damn,hehehe
<——Great! anyone who gets offended from this pixs, i think it’s time to take a deeper look inside yourself.
<——One of my favorite photos ever. Love the movie too. (notebook). They said it is the age when passion makes you miserable but it makes us envy them so it’s still probably good.
<——What can be better, being inlove and being beloved. I always loved kissing in the rain when the world is not enough. I want to try it. hehehe
<——One of the most inspiring photos. Sleeping like this must feel like Eden on earth. Whooooa!!
<—–This is when things get too hot :). But still.. it must be great.
So this would explain my feelings. How difficult it is to be away from someone that can give you much happiness, yet dreams are near when it is far to reach.
So this is it. Happy Hearts day to all! Have fun..
November 5, 2007
Astig——
After two (2) days of having a deserting headache, I feel relief now. Headache that busted the whole days of my vacation and only my knight in shining armor ~~ > my eyeglasses saved me from this infuriating eye problem. (I left it in my desk two days ago so I suffered a lot)
I’ve been hauling this dilemma since my college days. This is the most common vision problem that accompany with nearsightedness and farsightedness, it is Astigmatism. (I think it made me so mad that I found myself making this blog).
Astigmatism usually occurs when the front surface of the eye, the cornea, has an irregular curvature (curve). The front surface of your cornea is curved more in direction than in the other, so this abnormality may result in vision that is much like looking into a distorted, wavy mirror. The distortion results because of an inability of the eyes to focus light rays to a point.
What an explanation! I’m really mad. Because of the great degree of astigmatism I was prescribed the needs of lenses for clear and comfortable vision. To mention the trouble, annoyance and dangers caused would really makes your life extra uncomfortable.
Headache
Headache~~ The headache is unbelievably throbbing. It won’t let you sleep. No matter how many medicines you take, the pain will still bolt you up. You wanted to crumble your hair and shout the hell in pain out of it. Afterwards, you really wanted to vomit.
Distorted or blurred vision ~~ Honestly, I can still read without my eyeglasses but give me at least fifteen (15) minutes, my vision will change into blurry as if I have a double vision but in only one eye. Because of that it is very hard for me to focus on printed words and lines, and some time unable to see both near and distant without squinting. (Almost one (1) year ago, I met an accident which I believed caused with this blurred vision).
I think there are some symptoms of this eye problem. Better consult an Ophthalmologist regarding this matter. As of now, I just have this corrected eyeglass. I haven’t tried the contact lenses and no plans for refractive surgery.
I’m still mad. The headache is gone but I have to use my eyeglass for days. This really helped me a lot but truthfully I hate it sometimes, it’s not just only makes me feel that I am a little bit old, and some people might think I’m a genius but the grand reason is; it hides my beautiful eyes. Hehehehe.
They said astigmatism cannot be prevented since it is hereditary but it will not significantly affect your lifestyle at all. That’s good to hear.
I may have astigmatism but it makes me Astig! (hehehe).
